The Enlightened Manager

Bust out the Tissues: When You’ve Got a Weeper

My clients hate this part. You know, when you’re giving someone helpful performance feedback and they burst into tears? It’s hard to stay focused on performance feedback when it results in tears. A few pointers for those of us who manage a weeper.

“They’re making me feel bad!”

Bullpucky! No one can “make you” feel bad without your consent. Is it good to empathize with the emotions of others? Sure! But tears don’t mean that you are doing something wrong. Your emotional reaction is yours to manage, just like they need to manage theirs.

“They’re trying to manipulate me, or to end the conversation.”

Not necessarily. Some people have a wider range of emotional display than others. While it’s possible (in rare cases) that someone has learned to use tears as a conversation-stopper, it’s not the norm. Assumptions much? 

“They need to control themselves.”

Now we’re closer to the mark. Any of us might have a once-in-a-blue-moon experience of crying at work, but there is a reasonable expectation that employees are able to maintain emotional control. Why? Accepting feedback is part of the job, and we expect professional conduct. If emotions or tears get in the way of professionalism, it’s a performance problem.

Tips for Managers, When Employees Cry:

Check yourself -Are you being loud, abusive, or harsh? No one deserves to be belittled. If you are contributing to the problem, fix that first. Hand them a tissue and pause. Most of the time this will give the person a moment to compose themselves. If you like, you can add “I’m sorry that this upsets you, it’s not my intention.” Once they’ve composed themselves, continued.

Allow for Some Differences -We each have our own comfort level with emotions at work. If you are extremely composed, but your employee “has their heart on their sleeve” don’t judge them too harshly. Allow for a reasonable range of expression.

Inquire -“You seem very upset about this…” can be a mild probing statement. Perhaps there is something going on that you can’t see. Take a break. If this situation is a rarity, you might offer to pick the conversation up later. Don’t do this if they cry every time.

Set Expectations about Emotional Control – “I’ve noticed that you’ve cried the past few times I’ve given you feedback. Why is that? …. I don’t expect you to be emotionless, but it is a problem when your crying means we can’t have a conversation about performance. I need you to be able to listen to me and respond without breaking down. Can you do that?”

Cheri Baker, MA, SPHR is the President of Emergence Consulting. Emergence Consulting's services include Management Coaching, Leadership Development, Team Building, Customer Service and Communication Skills Training and Strategic Planning in the Seattle, WA area. More information on her programs can be found:www.emergenceconsulting.net

Keeping Productivity High over the Holidays

As the holiday season descends upon us, so too do the temptations to slack off at work.  There are the parties, the potlucks, the days off, the planning for days off, and let’s not forget online shopping.

In some organizations it seems to be a kind of unwritten agreement that little work occurs in December.  Sounds nice, eh?  This article is for those of us who need to keep productivity high.

A Few Tips:

1)      Be Present - This doesn’t mean you can’t take any time off, but the old saying “While the cats are away the mice will play” has some truth to it.  If you are gone for several weeks, or you are skipping out early it will be a temptation for your staff to do the same.  Set the example you want them to follow.

2)      Communicate Deliverables and Deadlines - In some businesses, there is less customer traffic over the holidays.  If you anticipate that there will be some downtime, set expectations about what work needs to be done.

3)      Set Reasonable Boundaries – “I don’t mind if you shop online from your office, just make sure it’s on your lunch break.”

4)      Shift the Focus to Systems -  What can you work on to make 2012 run more smoothly?  This can involve steps like improving a process, finishing a backlog of document scanning, or pre-loading information for the first few months of the year.

5)      Set a Shared Goal -  “By the end of December, let’s complete…..”

These are just a few ideas to keep productivity humming during the festive season.  I think out of all of them that the example you set will have the biggest influence.  Being present, productive, and positive is a model for your staff to follow.  There is nothing wrong with having some eggnog in your hand while you work, so long as your brain and hands are engaged with the tasks at hand.

How do you keep your team productive during December?

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Cheri Baker, MA, SPHR is the President of Emergence Consulting. Emergence Consulting's services include Management Coaching,  Leadership Development, Team Building, Customer Service and Communication Skills Training and Strategic Planning in the Seattle, WA area. More information on her programs can be found: http://www.emergenceconsulting.net

The Perks of Productive Rest

Something really cool happened last week.  I didn't have any consulting appointments!  This was really neat for two reasons.  First, the fact that my "lulls" have become very rare makes me feel proud of my business.   Second, I hadn't realized how hungry I was for some reflective time.

I didn't take the week off.  I worked half days, took care of some neglected tasks, and spent the other half of each day napping, watching Futurama reruns, and reading.

After the first day or two I was pretty bored, but I forced myself to stay bored.  Why?  When I'm bored my creative mind kicks into action.

Here are some things that came out of my slacker week:

1) A New Webinar - "Your Personal Strategic Plan" that will take place next month.  I'm stoked about it, and I'm using this new model with a group of health care managers right now.  

2) I finally hired a Virtual Assistant Firm to assist me with book keeping, marketing, and administrative projects.  Very exciting!

3) I came up with a great book idea, and began putting together a proposal and outline. (With the help of this handy ebook)

4) I came up with a half dozen ideas for new products/services, rejected most of them, but retained a couple that I am developing.

5) I beat my best score in Fruit Ninja.

OK, so perhaps the last one isn't that impressive.  :)  I suppose the point is that when I finally let my brain rest, good things happen.

Must find a way to do this more often! 

Staying on top of your To-Do List (And Book Giveaway!)

Have I mentioned I'm a total nerd about my to-do list?  I have long conversations with my husband about the best way to manage my task list and inbox.  Thankfully he's also a productivity nerd, or he would have kicked me to the curb years ago. :)

One way we can be more accountable is by having a good system for tracking, managing, and working our to-do lists.   When someone throws a task our way, we need to give them a timeframe, deliver on it, and also balance all those tasks with our long term goals while keeping our sanity!  If we focus only on the demands of the day, we lose our long term vision.  If we neglect those daily demands, we fail to deliver.

So imagine my delight that I've finally found something that works for me. :)

I'll briefly outline my system, but I'll also mention that the important thing is finding something that works for YOU.  Your style and your way of thinking!

How I Manage my Tasks:

1. I track my tasks and goals using an online tool called Toodledo.  (You can try it for free.) 

2. I organize my tasks using the system from Michael Linenberger called Master Your Workday Now!: Proven Strategies to Control Chaos, Create Outcomes, & Connect Your Work to Who You Really Are.

Why it's Working for Me

I won't reproduce Mr. Linenberger's work here, as it's his intellectual property and I encourage you to check it out directly, but here are a few things I really appreciate about his system.

1.  Three main categories of importance.  Some tasks MUST be done today.  I focus on those.  Others must be done within the next two weeks, giving me a "bucket" of upcoming work to begin chipping away at.  Finally, any tasks that are more than 2 weeks away I don't spend much time worrying about. 

This last one is a biggie!  By not stressing about things that are not on my immediate radar, I feel much less anxious than before.

2.  "Activating" goals.   This one sounded corny at first, but I'm a convert. I spend a few moments every morning reflecting upon how my tasks for the day connect up with my goals.  Every goal I enter into Toodledo is linked with a specific goal. 

The result?  When I look at my daily task of "Workout" it takes on more importance, because I've reflected upon how this task will connect with my long term health goals.  My tasks are more meaningful to me, which impacts motivation.

3. Portability.  I enter my goals in the Toodledo website, and it syncs nicely with my Windows Phone,  so I can check things off on the go.

So that's my system.  What's yours?  I'd love to hear.  To sweeten the deal, I'll select one comment on this post at random to receive a copy of Master Your Workday Now!, one week from today.

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UPCOMING WEBINAR:  Holding Others Accountable

My next webinar is on August 26th at Noon Pacific, 9am Eastern.  I hope you can join us!

CLICK FOR INFORMATION

Being Stingy With Your Time

The older (and perhaps wiser) I get, the more I realize that my most precious commodity isn't money, it is time.  Have you noticed that?

I think the big aha came for me last year when I moved from a rural area into the city center.  I went from commuting 1.5 hours pwer day to commuting about 45 minutes per week.  It was like feeling an immense burden lift off my shoulders.  Time is precious, and we waste so much of it sitting in traffic, numbing our minds on television because we are tired, and engaging in interactions that dampen our spirits.

Do you see the value in being stingy with your time?  Being stingy with your time when it comes to time-wasters is great, because it frees you to be generous with your time in other ways that matter.

Some ideas for preserving your time:

1) Move Closer to Work.  This can require a lot of work, but if it's an option for you, I highly recommend it.

2) Kill the TV.  This is one that is a struggle for me.  I do love to crash after work and watch The Simpsons to relax.  I also know that TV can become a kind of drug, numbing you but also sucking up lots of hours.  My hubby and I try to keep the TV off Monday-Thursday, to free up more time for conversation, books, and friends.  The result?  I'm getting more exercise, reading more books, and having more time with family.

3) Declutter.  Clutter takes up time and energy.  If you have a lot of "stuff" you need to manage it, clean it, move it around, and eventually dispose of it.  A friend of mine did the "9/27" challenge and got rid of 9 things a day for 27 days.  I'm still looking for ways to prune my possessions down - and I'm enjoying the freedom of it.

4) Break Up.  Do you have relationships that are sucking your time and energy without providing you anything of value in return?  I'm not suggesting you break up with your significant other or alienate your family, but it does make sense to take stock of your relationships.  If you have some friends, acquaintances, or coworkers who are negative, demanding, and difficult, it may make sense to distance yourself from them gradually. 

5) Outsource.  During the very busiest times of my life, I've hired professionals to come clean my house.  During tax season, I hire a CPA to do my taxes.  Once in a while, it makes sense to hire out certain tasks, to free yourself up for other things.  I can't afford the luxury of a housekeeper all the time, but I can splurge a little when it makes more sense for me to be out earning income instead of mopping the kitchen.

How do you preserve your precious time?

Podcast: The Manager's Dilemma

What do we owe to our employees when they are not being successful?  Do we owe them support and coaching, or is it really up to them to raise their own performance?  This podcast talks about the dilemma that all leaders must face and offers some down to earth advice.

Download TheManagersDilemma

You can also subscribe to the Enlightened Manager Podcast on iTunes

Fire or Retrain? How to Decide if a Failing Employee is Worth Salvaging

So you've hired an employee and they are not doing very well.  It might be a new employee, or one that you've had for years.  Regardless, you need to make that tough decision.  Do you fire them or do you retrain them?  In short, are you managing them out or giving them an opportunity to improve?

It's a darn hard decision.  On the one hand, you've invested so much in this employee already.  You may know them as a person and feel obligated to give them every chance for success.  On the other hand you don't want to simply delay the inevitable, if it is inevitable.  You don't want to spend your time bailing water out of a sinking ship.

One of the things you can do is to try and distinguish between employees who can improve, and those who cannot.  Here are some signs to watch for:

Develop Employees Who:

1. Acknowledge that they need to improve.
2. Seek out feedback on how they can get better.
3. Take responsibility for their lapses.
4. Demonstrate that they can take action to improve performance.
5. Demonstrate that they can maintain performance improvements over time.
6. Lack skills that can be developed by a trainer, boss, or coach.

Fire Employees Who:

1. Blame others instead of taking responsibiltiy.
2. Need to be "prodded" into improving performance.
3. Say they will improve, but don't seem to put in the effort.
4. Lack competencies that are very difficult to develop (ethics, integrity, salesmanship, empathy, etc)
5. Make short term improvements but are unable to sustain them without frequent reminders.

Sometimes you have an employee who straddles the line between "bad fit" and "trainable" and it can be a very difficult call to make.  In all cases, setting a clear timeline for improvement, being clear about what success looks like, and making sure that everyone understands what is at stake are all good strategies.

How do you decide what employees can be retrained, versus those who simply are not a good fit?  I'm curious to hear what you think!

How to be more Creative (Podcast and Toolkit)

Hi Everyone.

I wanted to direct you to a podcast from Tom Kelly from the design firm IDEO about how to be a better innovator.  If you are interested in strategies for being more creative or innovative, this one makes a good listen.

Click here to access the audio.

One of the concepts he discussed is the idea of a "tortoise mind" which some would call the creative unconscious.  Have you ever been struggling with a difficult problem?  One method that I've used (and that is discussed in this talk) is the idea of delegating difficult questions to your unconscious.

1. State your question out loud (or write it down).

2. Ask your unconscious mind/brain (silently or out loud) to help you work on this question.

3. Return to the question periodically, but go do something else.  (or take a nap)

4. Wait for your mind to return the answer.

This may sound nuts, but there is value to "delegating" big questions to your unconscious mind.  Think of your unconscious as being a supercomputer that hums in the background - and let it work for you.

Are you interested in creative problem solving?  Check out the podcast, or download the Creative Thinking toolkit off my free resources page.

Staying Focused When You're Overwhelmed - 5 Tips

Do you ever have that feeling that your brain is too full?  When you look at the long list of deliverables and projects and to-do items and activities you have in front of you, and your poor little synapses simply can't hold it all at once?

I think that is what my month is shaping up to be.  Coaching managers and business owners, designing and delivering a new motivational talk, facilitating team development sessions, acting as an emcee/facilitator at three different events, working with a personal trainer, skating at roller derby, teaching three university courses, oh - and did I mention I'm taking an improv class?

Even when everything you have on your list is excellent - it's still possible to feel a bit overwhelmed.  So here are some tips for staying organized when you have too much going on in that noggin of yours.

1. Get it All in Front of You - That means writing down what you need to do, and when you need to do it by.  When your brain is on overflow, let it overflow onto a piece of paper, an excel spreadsheet, or a sticky note.  Get it ALL down.

2. Look at Your Resources - Resources are things like time, energy, staff, money, etc.  Do you have the resources to do what needs to be done?  If not, how can you fill the gaps?

3. Think about your Energy Balance- By "Energy Balance" I mean that there are activities that add energy to your life, and those that drain your energy.  Do you have a mixture of both?  For example, I know that teaching 80 students this term will use up a lot of energy, but that my coaching, roller derby, and improv are likely to return much of that energy to me.

4. Build a Plausible Schedule- By "plausible" I mean your schedule should include not only due dates, but blocks of time in which you can do the actual work.  This can even be a short-term strategy.  For example, I tend not to use detailed schedules in my work, but when things get busy, I use my schedule as a tool to get me over the hump.

5. Keep the Engine Humming - The engine is your body and brain.  Sleep adequately, get some exercise, and take in fresh food and water. Your body is not simply a vehicle that transports your brain and mouth to various meetings - it's the engine for your productivity.

What tips do you have for staying focused when things get overwhelming?  The first two commenters to post a good tip here on the blog will get a free copy of my Advice for New Managers eBook.

The Devastating Consequences of an "At Will" Firing.

I got a call this week from a manager I know who was shocked to get called into a meeting with his boss last week and to be summarily fired from his job of six years.  No warnings.  No documentation.  And worst of all?  No reason. 

"This is an "At Will" state" he was told, "We don't need to give you a reason."  Then he was walked to his desk so he could pack up his belongings in full view of his team.  Then he was stripped of his badge and marched out the front door.

I'm always flabbergasted when a company makes a mistake like this.  Not only can you say it's deeply disrespectful to fire someone with no reason given, it's also incredibly damaging to the organization.  Here are some real life examples from this situation:

1. Other managers in the company have reacted with fear.  "If this happened to him, why can't it happen to me?  Will I be next?  Should I start looking?"  The grapevine is buzzing.

2. Some other managers in the company reacted with outrage.  They have begun speaking loudly about the lack of integrity of the leaders involved, as well as HR.  Reputations are being ruined, and trust is eroding.

3. The message being perceived by staff and management is "Be on notice everyone, you are disposable.  Once we're tired of you, you're yesterday's trash."

Now keep in mind, that there probably is a reason why this person was let go.  It may have been a very valid reason.  I'm not saying that the people who did the firing are bad, or bad intentioned.   But what is undeniable is that there is no "get out of jail free card" when it comes to terminations, especially for a long-term manager.  Whenever a termination is handled in this way, it hurts the company in all sorts of subtle but damaging ways.  I can imagine that the trust destroyed in this incident is going to take a lot of years to repair.

Enlightened Leaders - I hope you'll take this story as a reminder of how important it is to be aboveboard and respectful with the people you are letting go.  It isn't easy to fire someone, but do it badly, and the backlash can be terrible.  It is possible to let someone go without this kind of trauma.  We can do better. I know we can.