The Enlightened Manager

Accountability Without Anger, Notes on Emotional Intelligence

Hey Enlightened Managers,

I've been thinking this week about how emotions can be a very powerful tool.  How much emotion will you share?  How much will you hide?  While it's a very bad thing to be in self-denial about your own emotional state, it can be a good thing to be strategic about how intensely your feelings are demonstrated in the workplace.

Example One:

You get very frustrated with one of your employees.  When you talk with them, you make no attempt to mitigate or hide those emotions.  They get hit full blast.  Your employee loses respect for you, because they felt attacked.

Example Two:

You get very frustrated with one of your employees.  When you talk with them, you are careful to let none of that emotion show.  You are completely neutral.  Your employee hears your message but doesn't realize how serious their blunder was.

Example Three:

You get very frustrated with one of your employees.  When you talk with them, you are careful to let just a smidgen of your exasperation show.  You are supportive in your talk with them, but you also don't hide the fact that you are feeling frustrated by their actions.  The employee respects your words, and also recognizes the severity of the problem.

This is complicated by the fact that we each interpret emotion differently.   Your employees may need you to turn the dial up or down on your emotions, depending upon their sensitivity level. The moment you are NOT in control of that emotional dial is the moment you are not in a good position to influence others, I think. 

Enlightened managers, you are the conductors of the symphony.  You might choose to wave your wand sharply or softly, but the most important thing is to do so with intention!

Let's go out this week and create some good music, eh? :)

 

Webinar vs. Classroom Training: A Look at the Differences

Most of you know that I've been offering webinars over this last year.  It's been a great way to reach out and offer content to individuals who don't have an opportunity to be part of a leadership development group.

Webinars have some major advantages, and some pretty distinct downsides.  For those of you who need to consider (for yourself or your team) what format to use for development, here are some points to consider.

The Advantages of Webinars

• Accessibility:  Attendees can participate from any computer terminal.
• Cost Savings:  No travel costs, and materials can easily be managed in a digital format.
• Convenience:  Webinars can be recorded and replayed.  Flash-based training can be done at a time that suits the learner.
• Reporting:  Reporting tools allow for instant knowledge tests and instant trainer feedback.
• Variety:  Webinars can include audio, slides, videos, and quizzes.

The Disadvantagesof Webinars

• Individual Learning Only:  Webinars are great for delivering data to the learner, but very poor for changing group norms and behavior.  The peer-to-peer dimension is negligible.  Webinars don't change the group dynamic.
• Lack of Visual Cues:  The facilitator is not able to read body language or facial expression, thus it is not possible to see when people are confused or tuning out, unless they speak up.
• Lack of Tactile Learning:  It is very difficult to do exercises and role plays in a webinar format.  For many topics, this can be a handicap.
• Lack of Accountability:  Good training is about changing ideas and behavior, and that requires that we ask people to make a public commitment to the change.  This is difficult to do in the less-personal webinar format.
• Fewer Questions:  In a webinar, participants can't see each other.  This creates a dynamic where people are less willing to speak up and share their views and ask questions.
• Limited Discovery:  In live settings, groups generate ideas and discover learning together.  They have lovely "Aha!" moments.   This doesn't happen in the less personal webinar format.

At the end of the day, I think webinar training is a good option for individual development.  Take a webinar, learn something new, and then apply it.  Webinars do *not* work for changing the dynamic in a team or group of people.  Individual knowledge isn't a replacement for the kind of norm-shifting that can happen in a live setting.

Questions or Comments?  I'd love to hear from you! :)

 

Retreat Reflections

Hi Enlightened Managers,

I'm here in my office working hard to my "Lady Gaga Channel" on Pandora and reflecting upon how a little thumpy music keeps my productivity high.  It's needed to be high lately with everything going on, so I've been a caffeine fueled foot-tapping-to-the-music machine. :)

I just got back from a weekend retreat (Strategic Planning) and I wanted to share a few observations.

1) Prep Time-  No matter how much time you give yourself for retreat preparation, you end up running around the last day like a chicken with your head cut off.  Until midnight.

2) Checklists- I build a big pre-retreat checklist that includes *everything* I need to bring and I review it twice.  (Yes, like santa.)  Nothing is worse than getting to the retreat and realizing that you forgot your stopwatch, are missing a set of copies, or forgot your laptop. 

3) Duplicate your Files- I bring all of my files on my laptop and on a separate memory stick in case my lap top blows up.

4) Extension Cable, Aspirin, and Bottle of Water - These little extras save you headaches, literally and figuratively.

5) Proofread Twice, Print Once - I tend to forget this one.  I end up printing everything the week before and then have to re-print the day before when something changes.

It  was a great retreat, and again I was surprised by how much planning and preperation goes into making a retreat flow well.  Another thing I noticed, single day retreats are inherently more challenging than two day retreats.  Why?  In a two day retreat you can cover a lot of ground, sleep on it, and then come back refreshed for more.  In a one day retreat we can end up "packing" our brains with so much information it's difficult to make good connections and intuitive leaps.  Sleep gives our brains a chance to build some neural pathways that makes the second day of planning even more fruitful.

Just a few thoughts for you facilitators and retreat planners out there!

Facilitating with Your Tail on Fire - Reflections from the Field

After a summer full of interesting projects, one of the things I've been reflecting on is the art of facilitation, and what it takes to be a great facilitator of processes and people.

Facilitation is an odd thing, because it requires you to balance the extremes:

Clarity..... and Ambiguity
Planning....and Spontaneity
Uncomfortable Truths... and Finding Comfort
Facts.... and Feelings
The Past... and the Future

One of my biggest challenges this summer was working with a team of people who were having a lot of interpersonal conflicts.  That in itself is not unusual, but what was unusual was the incredible degree of fear they felt.  This was a group that was terrified if they said what they really thought, they'd be fired or penalized for it.

And as horrible as it may sound, there was a tiny bit of truth to that fear.

Tough, eh?

So what is a facilitator to do when walking into this situation?  I structured the heck out of it.  I built a ladder of mini-conversations, each designed to probe an issue gently and encourage some reflection and perhaps even action.  I worked hard to make sure that the conversation would be honest without making anyone feel personally exposed.

So what happened?

I walked in the room and it was clear that my carefully laid plans were not going to be very useful!  The group was honest, bold, even searing in their conversation.  They were not going to tiptoe around the issues.  They were going to tell the truth gosh-darn-it, plain and unadorned.

So what is a facilitator to do?  I tossed aside "the plan" and facilitated them through the discussions they needed to have.  THEY knew what needed to be said.  I knew I was there to give shape to it and keep things respectful and move them towards action and accountability.

It was a great meeting.  Courageous conversation lead to some real changes in that team, despite the challenges they face.  I honor them for that.

It seems to me that the art of facilitation is about being careful, meticulous, and planful to design a series of conversations that really matter.  THEN - when you walk in the door, the art of facilitation requires that you be willing to throw all that careful work out the window, because sometimes (most of the time?) the group has it's own wisdom, and you are just the conduit.

It's risky, challenging, ambiguous, and beautiful.  That's facilitation!

Cheri Baker is a facilitator and consultant and the owner of Emergence Consulting.  You can read more about her services and download free resources on her website.

Herding Cats: Tips for Facilitating Big Groups

Hey Everyone.

One of the trickiest things about getting groups of people to work towards shared goals is the idea of how to facilitate meetings.  My opinion is that most meetings are dull, soul-sucking events that accomplish little, so I've developed strategies to facilitate meetings of all kinds.

Here are some general tips, some of which that might surprise you.

1) Use Clear Questions - Have you ever had a group of 40 people discussing an issue and then when you report back it's like they all heard a different interpretation of the issue?  As a facilitator, you want to give people a very clear and specific question to consider.

Tip: If the question isn't clear - talk about that first!

2) Parcel Things Out as you Need Them - When you give people a pen, they want to write.  When you give them a piece of paper, they want to read.  When you give them a task, they want to complete it.   The trick is to give people things only when they need them.  If you want a group to discuss a question and present 3 answers, ask them to have the conversation FIRST, and then towards the end ask them to write down 3 answers.  Otherwise the quest for answers will impede the quality of the discussion!

Tip: Go one step at a time.

3) Begin Easy, End Hard-  Begin your meeting with something easy.  Gradually move into more difficult questions.  In team building, I begin with a super-easy set of introductions, but by the end of the day I am asking people to do more self-disclosure and presentation.  Give people a chance to get comfortable in the room.  Asking for a difficult discussion to happen first thing may shut people down.

4) Manage the Energy Level - After the lunch hour, meetings are enhanced by physical activity and more frequent breaks.  Get people up and moving after mid-day.

5) Use a Big Group-Small Group-Big Group rotation.  Introduce a discussion or activity in the large group, break into small groups for lively discussion, then debrief in the big group.  This structure allows the group to make shared-meaning, without the energy-suck that can occur when you're doing a big group discussion for long periods.

6) Sleep! - Facilitation requires a lot of physical energy.  You are not only presenting, but you are watching a big group of people on multiple levels.  Who is engaged?  Who wants to speak next?  Did everyone understand the question?  What is the body language?   This kind of "paying attention" can be as tiring as a day working on a farm.  Come to your event well rested and with some food in your stomach.  Remind yourself to stay hydrated. 

What are your tips for facilitation? :)

Cheri Baker is a professional facilitator and trainer located near Seattle, WA.

Bringing a New Team Together: Tips for the Initial Meetings

Hey Enlightened Managers,

I'm working on a really great project this month, designing a day of team building to bring a brand new team together.  The team building is part of a week of training that comes before a brand new healthcare facility is opening.  The leaders are top notch, the new facility is gorgeous, and I'm just excited to be part of it.  It's also got me thinking about what it takes to begin bringing a team together.

Most of you will be familiar with the stages of team development: Forming, Storming, Norming, and Performing.   Team formation is a big deal, because it is where people begin to form norms and assumptions about each other.  Those "unwritten rules" will be your allies or enemies, so why not be intentional about making good norms?

For those of you bringing together a brand new team for the first time, here are some tips:

1) Set the stage for respect and liking - We work well with people that we like and respect.  Setting this up might be as simple as giving people a chance to do an activity together that feels good.  Encourage discussion of personal information, hobbies, family, and friends. 

2) Make careful use of self-disclosure -  When we disclose personal or important things about ourselves and we feel welcomed and supported, it increases our trust level with a group. This could be something like "Tell us about one of your "big dreams" for your life or career."

3) Model, Model, Model - Is your leadership style participative, or authoritative?  Do you want people to speak freely, or go through a certain chain of command?  How do you expect titles to be used in your company?  How important is punctuality?  How will you respond when someone makes a mistake?   Think of your initial team meetings as an opportunity to model the way things will be.  Your "first impressions" will become the unwritten rules for your group. 

4) Use a Fun Challenge- Give your team a challenge to complete, and observe the dynamics that take place.  Who are the natural leaders?  Who tends to hold back?  Doing this in a teambuilding context gives you a chance to share your observations and ask individuals to think about what part they are playing in the team dynamic?

5) Talk about Success Factors - What makes a team successful?  What makes a team unsuccessful?  Talk about these things, and consider doing a little skill-building around key items like giving feedback.

These are just a few of the things I'm bringing in as part of creating a new team.  I hope you found them helpful.

To get in touch with me about facilitating a teambuilding for your organization,click here.

On the importance of Vulnerability

How often do you get naked with your clients or team?  Not literally of course, but in the sense of being vulnerable?

That's the subject of Patrick Lenconi's latest book "Getting Naked."   I enjoyed Lenconi's other books, particularly "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team and "Silos, Politics, and Turf Wars." 

As I read his latest fable - which talks about the importance of vulnerability and brazen honesty in consulting - I found myself thinking back to the moments when I had been brazen and/or vulnerable.

- The time I decided to take a risk by eschewing the "sales process" and simply walk in to a new client meeting cold - ready to begin consulting on the spot and give us a chance to feel each other out - without any masks.

- The time I turned to a coaching client, three sessions in, and acknowledged "this isn't working well - is it?" giving us an opportunity to change the way we worked together. (Which we did.)

- The team building session where I made a mistake, and then chose to point it out - using it as a teaching opportunity rather than glossing over it.

I enjoyed "Getting Naked" because after reading it, I realized the best moments in my own consulting have been those where I followed the principles that Lenconi described.

Perhaps another way of putting it is "Getting Courageous."  In order to do our best by the people we serve, sometimes we need to take risks.

If you'd like to check out the book - here is the link.

The Subtle Facilitator: Effective Leadership Out of the Spotlight

Hi Everyone.  Sorry that my posts have been a bit sparse the last few weeks, life has been nuts.  You know how you wait for things to happen then they all come at you in a rush?  Well, we've accepted an offer on our house, I've been busy with clients, trying to wrap up the final pieces of my new website (coming very soon), I'm teaching two university classes, and I've got two speaking engagements this week.  All good stuff, just a bit too much of it at once!  Life should get more manageable after the next few weeks.  Meanwhile, thanks for bearing with me.

Of course the plus side of all this craziness is that it gives me plenty to write about.  Today I wanted to share some observations I've made about facilitating without taking up too much air in the room.

Back when I took an improv class last year, I learned a few tips that help you speak with confidence and impact in the front of the room.  Plant your feet firmly on the ground, and feel connected to the ground.  Stand tall and speak, feeling the words come all the way from the soles of your feet.  This can help you appear and feel more confident.

But what happens when the facilitator is "too present?" in a room. What happens when the spotlight stays on you, instead of the people in the room and the topic at hand? It does happen once in a while. Here are some tips for lowering your presence as a facilitator:

1) It makes sense for a facilitator to be front and center during certain points of the meeting.  When you are convening the group, giving instructions, etc.  But during the majority of the meeting, you want participants to engage with the material and each other, not you as a "meeting leader."

2) One way to de-emphasize your presence is to change your position in the room.  If you are standing, and your group is sitting, you can step back a bit, lower your position by sitting, or move quietly out of the "presenter" position in front of the room.  The trick is to use your body position to de-emphasize your presence without jumping up and down like a demented jack in the box. 

3) The simplest way to break the "speak to the front of the room" dynamic is to get people up and moving around.  I like to mix things up by putting some of the topics around the room on flipcharts, and getting people to interact with them by walking around, speaking informally, and making notes.

4) Your phrasing will also make a difference.  Rather than asking a question of one individual, outline the task or activity, then ask the questions of the whole group.  "Let's talk about ..." is a way to kick this off.  Or you can do a "round robin" to get each person's view before opening it to the full group.

5) When the group "goes off the rails" topic wise, don't put the smack down.  Don't take control by saying "this is off topic."  Instead, share what you observe and let the group decide.

"I'm noticing that we're talking about how to fix the problem.  That's important, but it is not what we are trying to accomplish in this meeting.  Would it be OK to switch back to the agenda, or do you want to continue with the new conversation?"

Great facilitation is about helping people have conversations that matter, and come to their own conclusions.  That happens best when the focus is on the group, not you. I hope these tips help you create that dynamic.

Strategic Planning as a Symphony - Reflections

I didn't always enjoy strategic planning.  I remember being a mid level manager when my company was doing strategic planning, and my role was to wait for the leadership team to tell me what the strategy was, then make something of it.  While this wasn't necessarily a bad thing, I do remember feeling disconnected from the process.  When the strategies would come down from upon high, they felt emotionless and cold, and I didn't feel much passion for them.  I did my duty, but didn't find it easy to feel it in my heart.

Now that I facilitate strategic planning for organizations, it feels different of course.  I am fully engaged, and I love that almost visceral "snap" that occurs when the many facets of a plan come together in a well organized whole.  When it works well you can see all the different levels of the plan cascading perfectly like images in a prism, the vision translating into more tangible goals translating into specific tasks. 

But of course it is easy to feel that way when you are in the middle, trying to orchestrate all of those elements into a cohesive song.  But what happens when you are not in that executive board room, and when you can only see the small piece of music that you've been asked to play?  It becomes harder to sustain the whole work.  The notes falter too easily when you feel like you're playing alone.

My goal (dilemma?) is to help each person find some passion and engagement in bringing the entire symphony together.  This usually occurs when everyone can see and feel the entirety of the strategic plan as an integrated unit.  We need everyone hearing the same song, so to speak, and it gets harder to do this as an organization becomes larger and more diverse.  Not impossible, but certainly more challenging.

I don't have any answers today.  Just thoughts swirling as I sit here with my conductors wand and blank pages, seeking as always that spark of magic that brings the best of many minds together.  If I do my job well, as I'm pledged to, I'll be helping an organization create a work that will ring in their ears for the next few years, strong and steady, a rallying cry to the work ahead.

So for now, I prepare.

Meetings and Email Don't Mix

I recently spoke to an organization about doing some work with them, and it was shared with me that getting the CEO to turn off his laptop during our team meetings would be a hurdle.  He likes to multitask, I was told.  He can do two things at once, I was told.

I know, it's hard to put your cell phone or laptop away during meetings.  I too have been tempted to take a peek at my email when my attention slips.  After all, we are all so busy, right?

Here is the bad news.  Whenever you attend a meeting and you don't make eye contact, you are sending a clear message that you don't find the other people very important.  When you work on two things at once, they each get only half the attention, or even less.

Could we rework the norms of organizational life to say that it's perfectly respectful to write email when you're in a staff meeting?  I suppose we could all band together and try.  But I think that misses the larger point - are you being present?  Is there any value to paying attention to the faces and voices in the room?

Our society is increasingly connected.  I believe this is a good thing.  But it is getting a little crazy, isn't it?  I was at a retreat recently when one participant was pouring his heart out in an authentic and vulnerable way and you could look around the room and see people text messaging. I'm not kidding! 

The hidden messages in multitasking:

- You are not that important.
- This meeting is not that important.
- I will pay attention only to the bits that interest me most.
- I am so important that my communications can't be interrupted.
- I am here to get what I need, not to forge any relationship between us.
- Be prepared to be "bumped" by something more interesting.

Perhaps I'm a relic - caught in the snag of norms that change as generations come and go.  But I can't help but feel that presence is an important aspect of leadership.  I think to be fully present, we need to take our amazing devices and put them away when we're in meetings.

Or else we risk that our desire to connect unplugs us from the people right across the table.

I welcome your thoughts!